In his sidebar at So I Go Now, Jeff shares his image of the Jesus of our day.The Rider. I can't get it out of my mind.
I call out for Him, "Jesus, where are you?" He says,"don't you hear the rumble darling?" He wants to take me for a ride, but oh, I can't. I won't be able to look him in the eye,won't be able to lift my head, because I am ashamed. I am the woman at the well, the adultress waiting for the first stone, the woman with the "issue" who just wanted to touch his robe, I am Magdalene with the seven demons. Don't you see Jesus? It's all over for me. I have left you too many times, betrayed you like the whore of Hosea.Why would you want the likes of me? I don't want to shame you anymore.
I sit on my porch, torn and yearning. There He is just waiting for me at the curb, reving the motor now and then as if to say "Come unto me, let me give you rest".
(Obviously, I don't know how to create links yet, please forgive, but do find this blog)
Thursday, October 27, 2005
I hear the rumble
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6 comments:
Jump on....it's not always a SAFE ride but.....it's always a GOOD one!!!
From one CS Lewis fan to another....
Jan, I love this post, I love that you are sharing yourself and being so honest and REAL! My online name is Well Woman, not because I am "well" but because I am also the woman at the well, the adultress, the one with issues and problems and shame. Thank you for being open and sharing. I mentioned on my blog that if you look in my archives you can find some more of my "raw material" that shares my past. I guess lately I have been so focused on other things I haven't shared deep from my heart - but because of you I feel inspired to do that again.
Bless you! And like BJK said - hop on and take the ride!
I will email you how to do a link
hey :)
i found you through soigo and wanted to reach out as well.
i read your entire blog and just wanted to encourage you to keep seeking. as dark as the pit can seem -- and believe me, i've been in the pit and am still emerging from it, three years after the fact -- there is a light and it is warm in the light. much warmer than where you are now.
keep it at the foot of the Cross. you will find you have a certain community of folks here that will be pulling for you and praying for you. i am right there, with them.
~peace~
penni
martha, martha
"i don't want to shame you anymore."
wow. that's gut level, raw honesty.. but you're not alone. thanks for putting into words what many of us feel..
p.s.. thanks too for linking to my blog :-)
I recommend the book by John Elldredge..The Sacred Romance..
You sound so familiar to me. The book helped me look at things a bit differently.
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